New Year: Supporting Neurodivergent Kids During the First 90 Days of the New Year
The start of a new year often comes with a sense of urgency: new routines, new goals, and higher expectations to “get back on track.” For neurodivergent kids, however, January isn’t a fresh start—it’s a major transition.
The first 90 days of the year matter not because of what we introduce, but because of how we support regulation, predictability, and safety. Research consistently shows that learning and skill-building are most successful when nervous systems feel supported first. When we prioritize stabilization over acceleration, we set the stage for meaningful progress all year long.
The Nervous System After a Break
Extended breaks—like winter vacation—disrupt routines, sleep patterns, sensory input, and expectations. While time off can be restorative, returning to structured environments requires a significant amount of cognitive and emotional effort.
For neurodivergent children, this transition often shows up as:
Increased dysregulation
Reduced flexibility
More frequent or intense behaviors
Skills that appear “inconsistent” or harder to access
This isn’t regression. It’s a nervous system adjusting to increased demand. Stress impacts executive functioning, emotional regulation, and attention, which means behavior may increase before skills fully return.
When we view post-break behavior as information rather than defiance, our response shifts from correction to support.
Regulation Comes Before Expectations
Learning requires access—access to attention, memory, and emotional control. When a child is overwhelmed, the brain is focused on survival, not skill acquisition.
In the first weeks of the new year, pushing immediately into academic demands, therapy intensity, or behavioral expectations can backfire. Instead, the focus should be on helping children reach a state of regulated enough—not perfectly calm, but available to engage.
Supporting regulation might look like:
Adjusting demands without removing structure
Building in movement or sensory input
Offering meaningful choices
Allowing extra time for transitions
Regulation isn’t a reward for good behavior. It’s a prerequisite for learning.
Rebuilding Predictability and Safety
Predictability reduces anxiety and increases cooperation. After a break, children benefit from environments that feel familiar, clear, and consistent.
Simple supports can make a significant difference:
Visual schedules or daily routines
Clear, concise language
Previewing changes before they happen
Using first/then statements or countdowns
A helpful rule of thumb during this period is “same before new.” Re-establish known routines and expectations before introducing new goals or demands. Safety comes from knowing what to expect—and what is expected of you.
Rethinking Goals for the First Quarter
January is not the time for big leaps forward. The first quarter of the year is best used to strengthen foundations rather than chase new targets.
Instead of introducing numerous new goals, prioritize:
Maintenance of existing skills
Generalization across settings
Regulation and transition tolerance
Functional communication
Examples of developmentally appropriate early-year goals include:
Recovering more quickly from dysregulation
Communicating needs or discomfort
Tolerating transitions with support
Increasing engagement during familiar routines
Sustainable progress comes from stability, not pressure.
Progress in the first quarter may be subtle, but it is meaningful. By day 90, success might look like:
Increased predictability and trust
Shorter recovery time after stress
More spontaneous communication
Greater engagement during routines
These foundational shifts often come before visible skill gains—and they are what make long-term progress possible.
A Gentle Start Sets the Year
The goal of the first 90 days isn’t acceleration. It’s stabilization.
When children feel regulated, safe, and understood, learning naturally follows. By starting the year gently and intentionally, we create the conditions for growth that is not only measurable—but sustainable.
At NeuroKind, we believe that progress rooted in compassion and science leads to better outcomes for everyone.
